I Wish You Were Here With Me
by GabbyFreak
Summary: Part of the "Shadows and Rivers"-Verse. Takes place between part 1 (Our Love) and part 2. / Intermediate 1/ Shadow fall into depression after she has to part with River at Stormcage. / femslash...don't like, don't read


**DISCLAI****MER: **I don't own it.

**A/N: **This plays out right after Act 1.

* * *

**I Wish You Were Here With Me**

It was a fortnight after Shadow had had to leave River at Stormcage.

To say that Shadow was fine would be so far from the truth. When she had been back in her room she had relived the past hours she had spent with River, trying to convince herself that she had done the right thing and could live with it.

But soon after she deteriorated into something akin to depression. She rarely ate something and to get her to eat she had to be forced into submission or tempted with a very good reward.

Basically what she did was stay in her room all day and night and sulk.

She wished for River to be with her, to feel the happiness, the rush, again.

She was longing for River's touch. For a smile from River. For anything really that she could connect with River.

* * *

Sarah Jane was worried about Shadow. She didn't quite know what to do. After the Doctor had left her she had felt empty, but Shadow seemed as if River had died and wasn't just 3,000 odd years and god knows how many light years away. And didn't they have that mental connection? Oh. Sarah Jane realized something that Shadow hadn't. She was probably too consumed by longing to even realize it. She could call River.

Now Sarah Jane had to only get Shadow to face her. That meant Shadow out of her room.

* * *

Shadow had tried different things to alleviate the sadness, the longing, yearning, by any means possible. Well, maybe not by _any_ means, but any that were available to her.

So far, writing was the most effective. So she wrote down what she felt:

_River my dear,  
so many times I wished you were here now.  
And I wondered how it would be to lose your love, daily breathing in and out the pain that haunts me in my dreams.  
I don't even want to think about it. I want to focus on the good times.  
Do you remember our first kiss? It was like a blast right in my heart, you made it explode with emotions and feelings. I want to caress you, to lay you down on a bed of roses. What I dreamed of, you make it come true.  
I miss the warmth of your skin, your touch, everything about you. I wish we could just lie down and give each other over to sweet ecstasy.  
But then again, I'm reminded that you are not with me, and I wish you would be with me here._

Just then there was an insistent knock on Shadow's door.

"Go away!" She shouted irritably.

"No." Sarah Jane replied. She was determined that she would not leave without Shadow opening the door and coming down to the kitchen.

"Fine. Suit yourself." Shadow tried the "ignore-them-and-they-go-away"-tactic. It didn't work that much. Sarah Jane started to pound on her door and yelled her name in intervals. That was starting to get on her already frayed nerves. What could that woman so desperately want?

Maybe a bit of physical intimidation was in order. Shadow got up and unlocked her door, just to then angrily rip it open.

On the other side stood Sarah Jane and got a slight shock. Shadow really looked bad. "WHAT!?" Shadow barked at the other woman.

"When was the last time you ate something?" Granted that wasn't actually what Sarah Jane had planned as the first sentence, but given the circumstances it was excusable that she diverted from her plan.

"What do I know? Food isn't important. Now, if you didn't have another reason for bothering me, kindly go. Away!" Shadow just wanted to be left alone.

"No. You come with me this instant down to the kitchen, where we'll have a cuppa and some biscuits and talk."

"And why would I want to do that? I'm fine."

"You're not fine. Quite the contrary. Come on." Sarah Jane had run out of patience and roughly grabbed Shadow by the collar of her shirt and dragged her down into the kitchen, where she shoved her into one of the chairs. Then she thrust a plate of biscuits on the table and clanked down a cup of tea next to it so hard that the tea splashed a bit.

"Eat. Drink." She ordered. Then Sarah Jane sat down on the other side of the table and watched Shadow.

Shadow wanted to throw a tantrum for her mistreatment, insist that she was fine and didn't need anyone telling her what to do. But the biscuits in front of her were still warm from the oven and the smell was worming itself into her nose. So she thought that one biscuit couldn't hurt.

Sarah Jane smiled satisfied when Shadow took the first biscuit.

They sat in silence some time longer.

"What do you want to talk about?" Shadow refused to raise her head from where it was staring a hole into the table.

"Something that could solve our problems."

Shadow raised an eyebrow, intrigued.

"You sulk around because you miss River." Shadow huffed to that one. "But you _do _have a mean to contact her. You just have to remember. Use your mind, for once."

Shadow narrowed her eyes to that one. There definitely was a hint hidden in there. Why couldn't Sarah Jane just say what the solution was?

They were once again cast in silence.

"Oh. Oh!" Shadow slapped a hand against her forehead so hard that Sarah Jane actually winced. "I have been **so **stupid. Why didn't I remember that?"

With that, Shadow leaped out of her chair and drew Sarah Jane into a bone crushing hug. "Thank you!"

Shadow was almost out of the kitchen again when Sarah Jane called. "Tea!"

Shadow turned around, grabbed her cup and then went up to her room.

* * *

After she had downed the cup, she laid down on her bed and focused on River. It was difficult to do. She had to get the timing right.

_River? You there? _Shadow knew it could take a moment. It was a great distance and River wasn't yet used to using telepathy. But after about two minutes she received answer.

_**Shadow? That you? **_Shadow was very relieved that she had managed to get through.

_When are we?_

_**You brought me back to Stormcage with Jack two weeks ago. **_If there was resentment in it, Shadow didn't notice. She apologized anyway.

_I'm sorry. I had a fall into emotional turmoil. I simply forgot. I'm really sorry. Sarah Jane had to remind me. _

_**It's alright. I'm glad that you remembered at all. **_There was a brief pause. _**I miss you.**_

_I miss you, too, so much._

_**I wish you were here.**_ Both thought at the same time.

Shadow then send River the telepathic equivalent of a strong and tender embrace.

Shadow felt better already, knowing that now she had a way of being with River when she needed her most.


End file.
